i love you, mom.

Supporter, encourager. Someone who knows me from the inside out. Someone who always seems to know what’s on my mind. She knows what to say to make me smile, to laugh, to hope. She knows when something’s wrong, when I’ve been hurt. She knows when I’m happy, and she knows how to be my number one fan. She always has the perfect advice about anything, no matter what the situation is. She knows how to forgive and to forget my biggest mistakes that even I have a hard time forgiving myself for.

Of course, not every day we get along. Not every day is perfect, but that is beauty of it all. It is the hardships, the struggles, the obstacles that we conquer and the battles we fight that make us closer. She is a light to this world, exuding joy, compassion, understanding, and grace, something she has taught me. She is strength, courage, protection. She is comfort. She is love. She knows how to make the best day, to make the worst of days brighter. She is a listener, always willing to listen to anything and everything, no matter what it is. She is a shoulder to cry on and a hand to guide me. She is trusting and loyal. I know she will always be there for me, no matter where I go. I can’t imagine life without her because she is the best I know. She is my best friend. I love you, mom.

our deepest fear

Our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate. Our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure. It is our light not our darkness that most frightens us. We ask ourselves, who am I to be brilliant, gorgeous, talented and fabulous? Actually, who are you not to be? You are a child of God. Your playing small does not serve the world. There's nothing enlightened about shrinking so that other people won't feel insecure around you. We were born to make manifest the glory of God that is within us. It's not just in some of us; it's in everyone. And as we let our own light shine, we unconsciously give other people permission to do the same. As we are liberated from our own fear, our presence automatically liberates others.

—Marianne Williamson

Each and every person has a gift to give to the world. Everyone has a purpose. Life is not meant to be wasted in fear; it is not be to wasted wondering "what if." There is not enough time to modest, hiding our talents, our gifts. What good is it to cover up our best qualities because we are afraid that someone else may not accept us, may bring us down. Or perhaps it's the other way around. Maybe it's that you don't want to discourage others because you are afraid to be prideful. But, the truth is, everyone has something to offer. Everyone has something to be proud of. No one is perfect. No one will ever be perfect. But, to be proud and to be helpful are different. There is a difference between boasting and giving to others what you have been given. It is about using those gifts to the fullest. You're not going to be good at everything. No one is good at everything. But, it is the people who target their own traits and use them to their best ability that are hope to this world. It's about pleasing the One who created you, who gave you life. It is about making Him proud. You, me, your neighbors next door, your classmates, your parents, your coach, your mentor, the stranger you pass on the street, everyone has a gift. Let that gift shine. Let yourself shine because this is your chance to leave an impression on the world. This is your chance to pave your future, to decide how you will be spending your life eternally. Be strong, be courageous, because you are special, you are unique, you are amazing. You can do whatever you set your mind to. You can imapact and influence. You can make a difference. You can change those around you, and those will change others around them. You can be a light in the darkness.

the aftermath of a bitter destruction

Breaking News: Major Earthquake in Haiti.

The biggest earthquake to hit Port-au-Prince, the capital of the poorest country in the western hemisphere. A country, filled with depression, devastation, hunger, sadness, hopelessness, was struck by a natural disaster. A country with little to hold on to was shaken, shaken to the point that homes, hospitals, schools, and businesses collapsed and crumbled before the eyes of the Haitians. Many lost the only place they knew to call home. The small, one-room huts where they sleep, eat, escape from the evils of the oustide are flattened. There is nowhere to go, nowhere to stay. It is heartbreaking. Wails and cries fill the air. The effects are worse than a hurricane. Riots, hurricanes, and earthquakes have struck the helpless country of Haiti, but this could be the worse the it has seen.

Four children, under the age of eight, have lost all they have. They have never had much. I have never even seen a mother that looks after them. The small girl, a feeble grin painted across her face when I wave to her, hugs an infant in her arms. No more than a few feet tall, the little girl struggles to keep the baby lifted for her arms are bony twigs with little, if any, strength. The infant has no clothes on, like most babies in Haiti, and the boys sit atop the wall, waving to me as I sit on the porch. Their bleached white teeth beam in the sunlight because they know that someone cares about them, someone loves them. They don't get gifts from their parents at Christmas. No birthday presents either. But today, they lost their home. The wall that guarded and surrounded the shack they lived in fell to the ground. The wall that offered protection is gone. I thank God they are safe. Those precious children have nothing to call their own but each other. They will get through this. They are going to make it. The damage will most likely not be able to be fixed considering the condition the country is in. But I will continue to hope and to pray for a better tomorrow and a better future for the country of Haiti.

love never fails

"Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. It is not rude, it is not self-seeking, it keeps no record of wrongs. Lovve does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres."

Love is unconditional. It's accepting those who are not accepted, caring for those who are not cared for, believing in those who have no hope. Love is withstanding the challenges, jumping the hurdles. What is there if there is not love? It's simple. Nothing. Love is everything. A day without love is unimaginable. Without love, there is emptiness, loneliness, and hurt. But, it gives life purpose. Our greatest ommand is to love others. To whole-heartedly love those who are underserving because everyone makes mistakes. But, love is fulfilling. Love is happiness. Love is family, friends, the feeling that you're worth it. You will get hurt, you will experience pain, you will face failure; but love, love never fails. Love is forgiveness. Love is taking back what was lost. Love is powerful. Love is faithful. It is the greatest gift that we are given, and the greatest gift that we can give. Love is to enjoy the life given to you, to love every day because every day is a blessing. It is pouring your heart out to others, those who are "untouchable." Love is forgetting the past and moving forward, focusing on the future. Love always.

"And now these three remain: faith, hope, and love. But the greatest of these is love."

1 Corinthians 13:4-7&13

live like there's no tomorrow

I've never really understood what it means to live like there's no tomorrow. I've never really understood that is, until now. I seem to live a pretty routine life, going to school five out of the seven days of the week, passing the same people in the hall after each class, basketball every day after school. Sometimes it's hard to wake up in the morning when the sun has yet to rise with the temperature below freezing and think that it's going to be a great day. And what does it matter if maybe you aren't in the best mood, greeting everyone you see with a smile, having the best attitude that you can? It's hard. It's hard when the day before didn't go like you planned; someone hurt you, you let someone down, you let yourself down. It's hard when it seems like school is all the consumes your life, every hour you spend awake during the day. But you move on. The day passes by, you get through the challenges that you had been dreading and a new day comes. That is the beauty of it all. The sun sets on the day, and the sun rises on a new day, a new opportunity. An opporunity to live life like there's no tomorrow.

And then you question yourself. Why today? Why not tomorrow? And it's simple. Because tomorrow will not always be there. Tomorrow on earth is not eternity. Each day passes by in the blink of an eye. Suddenly it's tomorrow and yesterday was wasted. Yesterday was wasted because you were too busy worrying about the troubles of the day before when so much is happening in the present. It has most recently hit me. Almost every day I am reminded that I am leaving soon. Every day it is brought up by someone or something. Every day, I realize more and more that the tomorrow with the people I am surrounded by will be gone; the people that I love. Friends who have grown to be more like sisters, brothers; a brother who has grown to be more of a friend. And although it is sad, it is important to cherish the time that I have. It's time to start living in the present, to stop worrying about the day before, to stop worrying about tomorrow, for tomorrow will worry about itself. For now, it's time to start living like there is no tomorrow, to start living life to the fullest.

when one door closes, another door opens.

January first. 2010. A new year, a new decade, a new beginning. A time of fresh starts and new dreams. A time to look back at the year before and hope that this year will be even better. It's amazing how quickly one year, 365 days passes. It seems like just yesterday that we were celebrating the coming of 2009. And now, I look back and realize how much really happened in one year. I faced some of the best and some of the worst decisions of my life so far. I have realized what is means to have a true friend, and in turn, what it means to be a true friend. I have met certain people who have impacted my life, both positively and negatively, making me the person I am now. I have realized how forgiving, loving, and accepting my parents are; and I know that they will always be on my side no matter what. I have grown in my faith. God gave me a reality check, a slap in the face, a wake-up call; and for that I am eternally grateful. I know that no matter how difficult a situation may be, He will get me through it. He continues to change my heart, my attitude, and my life. I can only imagine the great things in store for this year. 2010 will bring a lot of change as well, as it is the year that I graduate and begin a new chapter in my life. It will be the first time that I will be eight hours away from my home and my family. It will be the first time I am separated from my friends, some of whom I've had since kindergarten. It will be the first time I'm on my own, having to make new friends and make my own decisions. Each day, I grow more anxious, but more excited at the same time. I'm beginning to cherish the relationships that I do have because I know that I'm not always going to be living next door to my best friends. But, that doesn't mean that it has to end. I am so thankful for the life I've been given and each year I realize how truly blessed I am. I look forward to new year that will come with new challenges, new friends, new experiences, and in turn, new memories.

When one door closes, another door opens.